The Art of Enjoying a PhD
When deciding to embark on a Ph.D. journey, mental health in academia, particularly the work-life balance, was something to consider. I have read about, seen, and faced the sometimes struggles of doing a Ph.D. And for me, this has also been a great opportunity for personal development. These years have been an excellent practice ground, indeed a school of both life and science. I have come to experience peace and enjoyment here. So, what is key to the art of enjoying one’s Ph.D. and avoiding a painful struggle, as many stories tell? It is, I have learned, the same as the art of enjoying the moment that is now, a matter of a shift in perspective. I remember reading one study that highlighted women as a risk group among graduate students [1] to be more likely to experience anxiety and depression than male graduate students. I thought, although it was not mentioned in that study – I, as a mother of three young children - is probably in a somewhat less represented risk group. This has challenged me to change and evolve my perspective – an opportunity I have become genuinely thankful for. Struggles make us grow and usually with the accompanying growth pains. The entire field of science aims to overcome problems, to gain new knowledge and perspectives. I think, looking at such an environment, it is not surprising that many within it might also encounter emotionally challenging moments in academia.
Tools have existed long before modern-day humans, slowly evolving over time. From the viewpoint of modern scientific tools, which are often restricted to analyze smaller parts of the whole, I believe changes of perspective will move us forward. These scientific tools are our eyes into the molecular world, and just like our biological eyes, they focus on one spot at a time, seeing only that with clarity. To see other things, we need to change our field of view, change methods. There is a blind spot for each focus where nothing can be seen - illustrating the importance of looking and measuring the same thing using different tools and methods. One such example of change in perspective is from a single cell to its environment in a tissue context. Likewise, I think that the research community today would benefit from a slight change of focus, from scientific results to the environment itself in which these discoveries are made. If, going forward, we bring our attention to how we are present when doing research, imagine what new insights and great discoveries could follow!
Acceptance, enjoyment, and enthusiasm. Looking back at the past years of research and study, I find that these three keywords best describe what is at the core of the art of enjoying a Ph.D. It was much later that I realized how I had been working towards and growing into relating to my scientific work throughout my Ph.D., which can be well described as what the author Eckhart Tolle refers to as “awakened doing” in one of his books on self reflection [2]. This has been a slow process of understanding that has become truly clear for me towards the end of my Ph.D. journey.
Acceptance - probably the most important keyword. When setting out on a journey towards a Ph.D., one will inevitably encounter challenges. From my own experiences with method development and application: e.g., results are unclear, statistical significance is lacking, there are not enough available biological samples, the method you are developing does not quite work and why it isn’t working is not yet known. On and on it goes… Any one of these can trigger worry or other negative emotions. That is not compatible with problem-solving and creativity. I’ve found that acceptance of the current situation was always the fastest way forward for every situation in the laboratory or in a project, where results or conditions are not optimal. When I say acceptance, I don’t mean one should not strive to improve and develop a project. But, in every moment and result, accept what you observe. Look with curious eyes for clues and details – instead of getting stuck in despair and wishing that the results you are currently seeing would be something else or be too quick to form an interpretation, closing off alternative explanations. At the most challenging times, I have even found it helpful to accept that I myself have difficulties accepting what I see. This has always freed up my mind and made room to find creative solutions in projects that might appear for a moment to have arrived at a dead end.
Enjoyment is also crucial. Broken down into smaller parts, our days as scientists usually consist of pipetting, talking to colleagues, and typing on a keyboard. We do these things continuously; we do them on a day when a large experiment fails, and we do them on a day when a breakthrough is discovered. Having spent many days working a pipette, I can say that even though the action itself remains the same, I started to observe that my enjoyment of it could vary greatly. Thus, enjoyment does not come from the pipetting itself, but rather it is something that one adds to it depending on one’s state of mind during that moment. Why is this realization important? When finding enjoyment in a small but essential step as pipetting, one becomes much more alert and present in the performance of the step. This alertness and presence of mind are very helpful when performing laboratory work in particular, where sometimes hundreds of simple steps are performed in sequence and with precision for an experiment to succeed. Thus, we can influence ourselves and add enjoyment to our work by a change in perspective through deciding to shift our focused awareness to the current activity. By letting go of all unnecessary thinking, we can perform work with higher quality continuously.
Enthusiasm, that flow of creative energy we sometimes experience. Where does that come from, and can we create circumstances that will favor it? Many times, in projects where novel ideas are needed or where one starts with something that does not quite work, then in my own experience, the atmosphere of enthusiasm among a group of colleagues has always generated new possibilities for changes. Suppose enthusiasm is grown and expanded from doing something one enjoys combined with a goal or vision. We, as scientists, have ample opportunity to create enthusiasm during our work. By practicing enjoyment in the small parts we do every day and letting it grow into a momentum of enthusiasm. By practicing acceptance and letting that slowly grow into enjoyment in its own due time. By not forgetting that enjoyment does not come from what you do; rather, it comes into what you do.
As I see it, we find ourselves living in these marvelous biological machines, but they do not include an operating manual with instructions. Instead, it is left up to us to figure this out by ourselves.
References
[1] Evans, T. M., Bira, L., Gastelum, J. B., Weiss, L. T. & Vanderford, N. L. Evidence for a mental health crisis in graduate education. Nat. Biotechnol. 36, 282–284 (2018).
[2] Tolle, E. A new earth: awakening to your life’s purpose. (New York, N.Y., Dutton/Penguin Group, 2005).